This is getting out of hand.

This is about the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. Robert Pattinson’s handwriting is now a font. Unbelievable.

My favorite fan quote on the subject is this one:

The sample font at Twilight Poison doesn’t look much like Rob’s handwriting, esp his signature. It has much more flow to it. Click here for an example:
http://img186.imageshack.us/i/robkv5eb1.jpg/ I’ve also seen him signing posters for fans on youtube vids. His writing has an easy flow to it. It’s creative & beautiful – just as he is.

RIDICULOUS! However, if they ever get around to making a Kevin Richardson font, somebody call me immediately. That is a completely different story.

In which I reach a new low point

I don’t like salespeople. They’re perfectly fine when they’re manning the cash register or straightening the towel displays. But when they call my office, follow me around a store or worst of all, stop by my cubby to “see if I need anything,” I practically break out into hives.  I feel an irrational need to get rid of these people and not hurt their feelings at the same time.

On the phone, I can usually skirt the issue, “I just haven’t had a chance to talk to my supervisor yet, I should get some time later with him next week regarding your product/service. I’ll give you a call* and let you know what he has to say.”  But when they stop by the office, they can see the lies written plainly on my face.  Why can’t I just tell them that we don’t need any promotional pens?

Let me describe my office to you. I am the only person in the office without an actual office and a door. My cubby is situated so that visitors approach me from behind and can block off the only way out. I am at the mercy of all who turn the corner and pin me in. I can’t escape without being seen, I can’t shut my door and if I pretend to be on the phone, the person waiting for me simply pulls up a chair and waits.

 Today, one of the other ladies in the office received her order of carbon copy forms from a local printer who is notorious for getting his feelings hurt and taking it personally when you don’t order from him.  He also loves to chat at great length about his personal life.  Just yesterday, I received a shipment from a larger printer in town and had 8 giant boxes of shiny, new brochures on display in my cubby’s entrance. I was trapped. If Mr. Talksalot looked through my plexiglass window, he’d see me and my 8 boxes and he’d be sure to turn the corner and interrogate me. So I did what any other rational, 25-year-old professional would do: I hid behind the filing cabinet until I heard him leave.

My hiding place

With my back to the filing cabinet and knees to my chest, I waited like Anne Frank until I heard him wrap up his story about his mother’s gout and finally leave.  The entire time I was under there, (my best guess is 4 hours although it was realistically more like 4 minutes) I kept thinking, “This is ridiculous! What if somebody comes back here to leave a note on your desk and sees you?! You are too old to be behaving this way! What is the matter with you?”

When I heard the front door of the office finally click shut, I crawled out of my hiding place, shoes in hand, and took my seat in front of my computer once more. Unbelievable. Surely other rational, 25-year-0ld professionals don’t hide under their desks. Maybe one day I’ll grow up.

*That’s a phone call I never make.

That’s more like it…

I guess Google and AOL figured out that I wasn’t the best source for late-breaking news and pictures on the flooding in Nashville.  After my brush with stardom, I’m back to a comfy 82 hits today. I certainly hope this doesn’t count as my 15 minutes of fame.

Words of Wisdom

Julie left this comment on my Muppets post the other day and I thought it would behoove (pardon the pig humor) me to repost it.

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.”     – Miss Piggy

 

Image of the Divine Miss P from here.

Happenings in Augusta

Congratulations to Phil Mickelson on his 3rd Green Jacket!! 

In other news, I took a spin through the local Salvation Army this week and uncovered a few treasures.  I found some cute cut-glass dessert bowls, a few candle sticks, some pretty Reader’s Digest condensed books (just for looks), a few “silver” bowls and two side tables. One side table was for me, one was for Susie.

I did have a cheap old tv stand covered with a round table top and hidden by a tablecloth between my sofa and leather chair. It looked like this:   Yuck.  To replace it, I picked up this little gem for only $14.99.

After a good wipe down, a little light sanding, a few coats of spray paint and new hardware, she looks like this:

MUCH better!! The pop of turquoise was just what that room needed. And the doors remind me of a turquoise bracelet.

I haven’t settled on just what to do on top (I think that lamp is a little too big for this table) but you can sort of see the Reader’s Digest books. Maybe someday I’ll get around to recovering Grandmama’s sofa.

Also, I just found these pictures on my camera and realized I’d never blogged about it.  A few weeks ago, Susie, Mama and I hosted an organizing shower (guests brought organizational items) for Susie’s friend Lyndsie who is getting married this month. Her wedding colors are hot pink and lime green (very Lyndsieish) so she’s had hot pink and lime green coming out of her ears. We decided to use those colors but also add in yellow and orange for a citrusy twist.

I ran tulle and various ribbons in our color scheme down the center of the white tablecloth. We kept the serving platters, bowls, etc simple by just using white and cut-glass. The centerpiece was a snap. We just placed one of Mama’s African Violets in the center of a vase and stuffed tulle around it.

 Adorable cupcake papers from here.

 The lovely bride opening her gifts.

After the shower, we put the leftover tulle to good use.

Doggie Ice Cream

If this blog was a baby, I’d be arrested for neglect!

I had a most fun weekend! I dogsat for a friend who has two giant Golden Retrievers and they were the sweetest, snuggliest things! Here they are chilling out after a long walk.

In other dog-related news, if you’ve never taken your dog through the drive-thru at Bruster’s, you need to go right now! Bruster’s gives a free dish of doggie ice cream to any dog coming through the drive-thru and I’m here to tell you, it’s the cutest thing I’ve ever seen! Me, Susie and Mama took Tater through this weekend (after she laid down in the shade five minutes into her walk) and you’ve never seen a happier dog!

Look at that silly tongue!! Mama was “spoon” feeding her with the milkbone that comes in the dish.  When we got her back to their house, she licked the dish clean and dry and brought it in the den to tell us she wanted some more.  What a darling angel!!

I don’t know what they put in that doggie ice cream but judging by Tater’s approval, it must be delicious.

I had a dream

I had a dream last night that I painted my dining room table a rusty, barn-like red even though I actually just finished painting it cream.  I wonder if it was foreshadowing? I’m pretty proud of the current finished product:

But I couldn’t help but wonder (Carrie Bradshaw style) if it wouldn’t look great later down the road like this:

I’m sure a red pedestal table will fit right in when I live here:

Of course, I also dreamed that I was abducted by John C. Reilly and had to shoot him multiple times with his own pistol because he wouldn’t stop chasing me. But I digress…

On a happier note, I found a new website to stalk and peruse when I should be doing other things.  Farm & Cottage Holidays is similar to Cottages & Castles except it features only homes for rent in Devon, Cornwall, Somerset and Dorset, UK.  So, if you’re looking to rent a cottage like the one Kate Winslet had in The Holiday (see below), this is the place to go.

Tell me about your crazy or funny dreams.  Have they ever led you to do anything ridiculous?

Always Remember. Never Forget. Elephants are Faithful, 100%!

The church I work at is holding a White Elephant Sale this weekend.  As a church employee, I got to scope out the deals a couple of days early.  I had every intention of responsibly restraining my wallet from throwing all of its money at the sale but unfortunately, it had a mind of its own.

There were so many deals to be scored and I came away with four of them.  The first thing that caught my eye was this beauty: That fabric lining inside sealed the deal for me!  It needs minor cleanup and was a steal at $50!

Then I second guessed myself and thought I should have purchased this piece:

But I think I made the right decision.  This piece, while it has major potential, is missing glass panels, needs complete stripping and sanding, repainting and new hardware.  It’d be a fun project but it was also $50.  I thought the first one was a better deal.

Then I spied a pair of these chairs.  I lurve that fabric and I’m hoping I can spot clean it and keep it.  If not, I think I might paint the wood working white and pair it with a fun fabric.  What do you think of these as head chairs for my dining room table?$25 for the pair of them!

Do you see that cutie white chair in the background above? I bought it too! The upholstery is in good shape so I think I’ll clean it up and keep it as is too.  I’m thinking my bedroom…

Finally, as I was walking out, I noticed this set of 30 vintage postcards featuring the fish of Florida.  I think they’ll be so pretty when framed in a grouping.  The ladies at the sale were so sweet, they threw them in for free!

I wish now that I’d gotten this gem: Haha! Maybe I’ll go back and get it for Daddy’s birthday.

Also on my way out, I noticed something that struck me as hilarious.

It’s a box from the Home Shopping Network full of romance novels.  Sad but true.

Leave me your thoughts on my purchases!

If I lived in the 1700s…

If you’ve been around me for more than like 12 seconds, you are all too aware of my obsession with dogs.  I was flipping through a magazine while washing clothes at Mama and Daddy’s last night and ran across this ad for Virginia.  I couldn’t help but laugh aloud at  this silliness! I love every single one of those hilarious dog faces! Look at their expressions! They couldn’t care less if the British were coming… well, maybe that chihuahua she’s holding could.  He looks a little terrified.  Don’t ask me what this has to do with living passionately in Virginia but I think it’s hysterical and it makes me so happy that it’s now hanging in my office.